Monday, November 10, 2008

Stick and stones

One year and four days ago I, with great fear, clicked on the PUBLISH POST button for the first time. That was 185 posts ago. Over the course of the year it has become easier to write my thoughts down, sometimes even getting through an entire post without having to use my Websters Dictionary more than once.

An important principle that we have learned in our family is to never write things down that could some day come back to bite you in the ass, or that potentially could hurt another person's feelings. In my storage room I have a folder of papers that are proof of the power of unkind and untruthful words. These papers are safely kept under lock and key and are rarely looked at. We all know what is in them and have tried to put them behind us, a heartbreaking task that has been easier for some than for others. Oftentimes we can even laugh about the absurdity of the contents. Nevertheless, those words that were written still pack a mighty hard punch in the gut.

Last night I learned of another piece of paper that was written. I have not seen it, nor do I want to see it. It is unfortunate that the person who wrote this poem didn't stop to think that it would be viewed by others whose feelings would be hurt. Totally innocent people. It will be passed down through generations. I have known the author of the poem for most of my life and those words were totally unnecessary. I'm not claiming the writer doesn't have a right to her feelings, just that it was cruel.

In that same storage room with the folder is a plaque that I was given a few years ago. The person who designed the plaque in honor of years of service I had given had no idea that the words on it would cause offense. She innocently believed that it was humorous. The piece of wood to this day has not been hung on a wall or displayed where anyone else could see it.

Hopefully over the last year I have been able to temper my words and not cause hurt feelings. Yes, there was one post that was up for a day before Zeus questioned me about it. He was right and I immediately took it down.

Holding my tongue has never been my strength but I am working on it. I'll file the knowledge of the poem in with the folder, locked away. I don't need to do anything. The best revenge is a life well-lived.

Hey Muriel, hope that you made it home safely!



cuz2u said...

I know what your talking about and i am sorry about that. I don't want to stick up for that person. I would hope it wasn't meant for you. Try not to take it to heart. That person has done alot of mean things and I try to roll them of my back as best as I can.

Numismatist Facts said...

Oh cuz, no apologies are necessary. I learned long ago not to take these things personally. That doesn't mean they don't hurt intially but I have also learned to smile and let them go much faster. My thoughts are with you.

Muriel said...

Hey, I did not know you took that pic! Thanks for everything, especially the food. You're right, the sandwich was delicious. I hope Zeus told you I called. What I didn't tell him was that I got pulled over. No worries though just a highway patrolman with nothing better to do. I think I surprised him by being a nice mom with a baby in the back of the "punk teenager" car.

Eris said...

I don't know if I've just had more practice, but I actually enjoy reading the folder and my personal collection. I find them humorous.

What can I say? After years of emotionally cutting, I've gotten dead to everything but the funny.

Cuz: Don't you ever feel a need to apologize. We here claim no responsibility for Nincompoops or anyone else.

Sharyn said...

We do step out on a ledge when we choose to put our words in the public domain don't we? I used to be so 'private' it is a wonder anyone knew I was alive. But I got over it. :) The Philip Carr-Gromn quote at the bottom of this post last month still resonates for me.

I think I passed 600 posts on that blog not too long ago. Amazing. We are wordsmiths for sure.
Sharyn/KalamaQuilts & Quirkeries

Numismatist Facts said...

Sharyn, that was a lovely quote. Thank you.

I should spend less time wordsmithing and more time quiltmaking.

cuz2u said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
G said...

(hey, it was almost a year ago that I put up my first post too!)

this was a beautiful and poignant reminder of the unexpected power of words (to hurt and to heal). I constantly need the reminder to hold my tongue, thank you for giving me that.

Karen said...

For all the times I was on the giving end of situations such as those, I am ashamed... at least most of them ;-) I try to deal with life with a sense of humor but there is a line that is easily crossed and I'm sorry for the situations that you speak of - the intentional ways of hurting others. You're such a generous, fun, and loving person and I'm glad you're in my life.

Happy Bloggiversary and here's to LOTS more posts!